A little boy crazy

As a huge Sex and the City fan I have started to see a correlation in my life. Maybe it's because I make the same mistakes with it comes to guys or even the fact, that I am always broke yet, manage to afford my high maintaince ways. But no, it's about the guys. It's ALWAYS about the guys. And the guys in my life have seem to reflected the guys that Carrie, Samantha and Miranda have dated. I would involve charlottles men but, I actually thought Charlottle had a good love life. I've come to the conclusion that they can be divided into the four categories.

Mr.Big : The unattainable one. Over the top with his words. He makes you swoon. He brings you on this emotional roller coaster. That, for some unexplainable reason, you always get back on. You love to hate him but hate to love him. I think every girl has met this guy. The one that no matter what his done to you, you'll always care. You can't seem to shake him. That's your Mr.Big

Aiden Shaw : The Hopeless Romantic. The good guy. The one who isn't afraid to commit to you. Who has absolutely everything to offer you. On paper, his paper. But in real life ... Missing something you just can't put your finger on. This guy loves you, would do anything for you. But you hurt him. And he forgives you and, still thinks the world of you. But yet you always find yourself pushing him away. That's your Aiden Shaw.

Richard Wright : The lover. The over-lover. He says he loves you but he has a wandering eye. In fact, it's not you in specific he loves but woman in general. And he just feels that he must spread his love to everyone. He doesn't want to settle down. He wants to explore the world and the woman in it, at the expense of your heart. That's your Richard Wright. Who really isn't right for you at all.

Steve Brady : The dreamer. The sweetheart. The ambitious one. He may seem a little too .. Under your league. But his real lover. He cares. He want the best for everyone. And his definitely not afraid to commit to you. His your best friend who has the best intentions. Although a little misguided at times. A bit annoying at times with his infatuation with you. But you know his hearts in the best place. That's your Steve Brady.

Now, I'm not trying to judge EVERY guy in the world. I'm positive that not every guy in this world can fit into these four fictional male characteristics. It just so happens that majority of the ones I met do. Am I lucky or what ? Clearly. Any of the guys in your life seem to match the ones from Sex and the City ?

Oxo,
Dèjia

The art of letting go .. or Jumping Off a Cliff Alone

 I believe in fate and destiny. I believe in love. I don't believe that prince charming is going to show up, rescue me then take me unto his horse and we're going to ride away into the sunset. I am a realist, after all. I will, however, always being waiting for Jake Ryan to pick me up in his red porsche. (I am still a girl, after all). But I have recently been reading many pieces of writing that have all had the same general topic. Moving on and letting go. Which, I have to say are two completely different things. Now, I don't know if this pure coincidence or the universe trying to send me a signal. If it's the latter then, THANK YOU UNIVERSE. I really do appreciate your sick sense of humour. If it's pure coincidence then I have fallen upon these beautiful pieces of writing, but it made me think about relationships. Everyone knows how hot a flame can burn when relationships first start out and how fast they can fizzle out. And oh boy, can they fizzle fast. Leaving you with the ashes filled with memories and feelings. Of course, the first month of a break up (if you're the breakee), can be horrible. You're torn between blowing those ashes away forever or figuring out a way to make those ashes turn into a fire again. After about the fourth or fifth month after the break-up, you just can't stop thinking. You think of the good times you had, the bad times you had and, " Why am I still thinking about this break-up !?"  It's the memories that haunt you that are still making you think of everything. The memories are what bring the feelings out. Those memories bring up the feelings that you felt in the moment and if you haven't quite moved on yet, then it's normal to feel some nostalgia.Which poses a great question, how can you distinguish between being in love with the memories you had with them and being in love with them? You can be in love with ideas and concepts. You can be in love with words and songs. And you can just as easily be in love with memories. Moments with people are fleeting  but memories .. memories are ever lasting. They never change. They never leave. They're magical. For the simple fact that they always transport you back to a time or place that made you feel something amazing. And I'm not talking about something that made you happy or sad. I'm talking about more intense feelings. Something that made you feel exhilarated and alive, something that chilled you to your bone with over whelming sadness. People live inside memories. Our mind is capable of extraordinary things. Yet, somehow, our mind cannot erase memories that we no longer want to remember. How convenient is that ? The only reason we can't let go of these memories is because we can never  forget them. We basically have to work against ourselves to forget these memories. Or at least put them in the very far corners of your mind. I have yet to master the art of letting go. You can call me a memory hoarder. I remember everything. Well not everything because I always forget to do the dishes or do my biology homework. But I always remember moments that turn into memories. And I think I love them more than I ever did the people in them.
Déjia oxo.

How To Lose a Guy in One Day (Or Sooner)

I have yet to learn a lot of things on the touchy subject that is guys. There are so many things that confuses me about them. How do they wake up with their hair perfect ? Or get away with wearing the same clothes everyday and we still swoon over them. Why do they never call when they say they will? and when in fact, they do end up calling, its past 11pm and they sound a little too happy to call you. You know when they all of a sudden are just dying to see you and hang out ? Its obviously because you are so gorgeous and amazing, right? Sorry to bust that bubble (even though you all are gorgeous and amazing) that, my fellow ladies is called a BC (Booty Call). Although in the past two years with the release of Drakes single, can now be referred to as "Marvin's Room. I would say the "Marvin's Room call has a bit of a sadder context..(I hide my phone when I go out because I tend to "Marvin's Room". Even the best of us fall victim!). We have all received this call and, we have all answered it one too many times. Lets be honest. The opposite gender should must definitely be added to the seven wonders of the world. They have and will forever always be, a mystery. I, myself, do not have a great track record of guys. I enjoy the mystery. I like the unattainable guys. What can I say? I'm a masochist. I have yet to master how to keep a guy, however, I do know how to lose one ! Here are the tips that helped me let the one get away, (that hot guy you met once at party and sparks flew). Also the tips to help lose the one that needs to get away, (that weird guy that stalks you in gym class).
-Be Yourself.
Boys LOVE this one. You know when you talk about the male singer your obsessed with or, talk about that tv show with the vampire love triangle? They love it. They loving getting to know you. Especially on the first time to your guys ever hang out. Tell them your life story. Better yet, do all those weird things you do at home by yourself like crying when Big leaves Carrie at the alter while eating fries dipped in hot sauce. You know all the things you feel like you should do when you're completely comfortable with a person ? Do them. Nothing is sexier than being weird (I say this openly though because sexy can weird.)
-Have a Life.
Have other things going on in your life. Play a sport. Be in a play. Have a part-time job. Volunteer somewhere. Do anything that doesn't involve the guy you're seeing. It will drive them crazy because no one likes to be a second priority. Especially those guys that like to the center attention and the crazy obsessive type. The ones that need to be your #1 and the only thing that makes you happy. Nothing drives a guy more crazy than you having more going for yourself than he does.
-Actually Care.
Now this is an important one. Showing that you care shows commitment. Commitment itself is a big one and nothing scares a guy off more than it. It means the thrill is officially gone ! There is no chase anymore, the fun is over. He has you and he knows it. There's no entertainment in that, is there ? Along with being committed, you're also supportive and loving. Now who wants that ? Sound suffocating to me and a long list of emotional damaged or unavailable guys. (Those just happen to be my forté). And they just so how happen to be everywhere. They don't know how handle your caring or understand it. So do it because they'll leave.
-Actually Don't Care.
This one is equally important. If you're acting like you don't care that means you GENUINELY don't care. Whether you want to admit it or not. It doesn't matter if you're a man or woman, NO ONE wants to be around someone that doesn't care. Trust me, people can always tell when you don't care, Whether they chose to ignore to or not is up to them. That creepy guy that stalks you in gym class and always stares at you in hallway probably won't catch on to the fact that you don't care. So make it obvious. That hot guy you met at party, however, may catch on a little faster. He won't hesitate to leave. Moral of the story, eventually they will both leave if you show you don't care.

All this being said, the right guy will stick around regardless of everything and he won't leave. Well .. maybe he will leave but he'll come back. He will put up with your weird, quirky habits and love the fact that you enjoy playing with puppies for free. At least that's what I hear, I wouldn't know ;)
Déjia oxo.

Not so " Sex and The City" of me

Hey guys, so I've been posting a lot of "OOTD" and other pictures and I've been neglecting my writing. I actually love writing so, I do believe that writing should be a big part of what my blog is about. My blog is a reflection of myself in ways that I can't express otherwise, just as fashion is. Which is why I believe personal style is so  important. The way you dress and present yourself is how others will you see you. I fully believe in " If you look good, you feel good. " I try to make my outfits reflect who I am. For that day at least ;-) There are so many things that can affect what I decide to adventure my day in, from the weather, to the mood I went to bed in, even the music that I listen too ! You can see my mood and feelings through my outfits, I'd like to think. Yes, many days I do just throw on random shit and leave my house. Sometimes putting on some pants and a bra is the biggest struggle of my day . Most days I just want to sit in bed, watch Sex and The City, stuff my face with junk food and contemplate my life. Lately, I have been feeling very out of whack with my own body, emotions and life. I am just a teenage girl ( newly turned 17 !! ) learning how to live my life. Key words : MY. LIFE. I find that there are a lot of restrictions and complications to being a girl turning into a woman who is rather a wild thing. And by wild I mean out-going, adventurous, dreaming, over-loving and maybe even a bit high maintenance. Regardless of all the complications, restrictions and unrealistic social views of what a womans' body should look like and, what a woman should act like it teaches you an invaluable lesson. Chose yourself. Always. It's not about choosing the "right" dress, "right" man, or "right" job. It's about choosing the "right" version of yourself which will, eventually, lead you to all of those things. However, with stating that, its poses another great question. "How do you ever know when it's right ? " Is it the moments when you feel that indescribable feeling ? Or the times when you're left speechless from the words or actions of someone else ? I don't know. Who really does ? I think before you can ask yourself  "If it's right", you have to ask yourself " If it's wrong"

Late night thoughts for my lovers with insomnia,
Déjia oxo.